Life mein kabhi kabhi aisa bhi hotha hai??

Yesterday there was a lunch party given by one of my colleagues on the occassion of his twins first birthday. @ the party, one of my colleagues 5 year old daughter, Anushka sat beside me at the lunch table. I was generally talking to her about her school, her dress and generally tping (Time passing) with her. I didnt realise, we were giggling and talking so much almost whole tables attention was on us. Then after sometime Anushka's mom came as she was not eating her lunch and told her to finish her rice and only then aunty( Yeah me!!) will play with her. Til then it sounded ok to me too.. so even I committed to Anushka that I would play with her if she finished the rice in her plate! (Alas!) And then comes the not so nice part... She finished her lunch and asked me to play TAD. I was not sure what it was and asked her mom what it was and she started laughing and said its Running and catching! @#$#@$@#$ How can I play Tad with a 5 yr old at a party with all my managers right there!!!! I tried to convince the lil one that we cant play there as there was no place and that she would be tired as she had her lunch just then but in vain. She sat right there on the floor and started crying and her mom was like, please play for sometime!! Even I didnt like to see the lil one crying but How can I play running and catching???? The heavens finally fell and I actually walked behind her around the table to catch her and to increase my embarrassment, Anushka shouted.. "Aunty Run.. dont walk!!!" Bhagwan.. Why didnt the earth split in to 2 and take me in!! Kids can really be so tough sometimes!! and later ( 10 very long minutes), luckily for me, she was tired and then we stopped playing Tad and settled for some silent sitting games. I was almost dreading she would ask me to play ringa ringa roses!!! But she compensated for everything later by telling that she likes me and gave me loads of kisses! I love you Anushka!

What is it ??

Sometimes it becomes so difficult to differentiate whether the other person is commenting or complimenting you. And these days such statements have increased in number for me. For eg.,

1) You are not as fat as I expected . ( what??? whaaaaaaaaaaaat??? Either I am fat or I am not. Period.)

2) Very nice snaps, you are very photogenic . (heloo.. yes, I dont look good otherwise and no wonder you were surprised to see that I look good in snaps? )

3) Ohh you cook??? ( and I hate the expression with which they say that.. How can anyone assume if a person cooks or not just by seeing them... Crappy Assumptions!! )

4) Your lunch tastes good today! you only cooked? ( Its me who cooks, its me who eats.. I dont need your vishesh opinions on my lunch box)

5) Not bad. You did pretty well in the exam. ( I know.. I know.. you didn't expect me to pass the exam!)

Am sure there were more but cant remember any more now.. will keep updating this post.. am sure there are lot more to come!

Presenting.. Joey the chef!

Sometimes you find out some good things accidentally.. like Newton got the idea of gravity from the falling apple. Today I found a new recipe for egg Curry. I was always a great cook ( yes yes everybody agress I know) but today I did something, that made me feel so proud of myself!
Today I started off to cook the most easiest thing in the world egg curry. Everything seemed to be going smooth, until I tasted the gravy. Eeeks.. An extra pinch ( ok 2 pinches) of salt slipped through the spoon in to the curry.. Not my mistake you see!
Now to lessen the extra salt effect, I added milk ( lil better), then curd(even better), lil tamarind paste (now it tastes like something) and to lessen the effect of tamarind I added more masalas.. everything I cud lay my hands on, chicken masala, garam masala, corriander powder and Lo! when I tasted the end product.. yummmmmmmm!!! and it was a super hit among my teammates and one of them even asked me to share the recipe! and here it goes for her :) First add more salt and then all the others ingredients mentioned above particularly in that order :)
Clap! clap! and more claps!
(Joey the chef taking a bow)

All written in the face!

Last wednesday I went to a party at my colleagues place. They being a bengali family, needless to say the food was amazing. Especially the kheer. So yummy. I asked them for recipe and just said I liked it very much ( yes only that) .Today after a week, I met same colleague in the corridor and I dont know why, I was reminded of the kheer, tho I didnt say anything to him. It was as if he read my mind or my face , he said there is lot of kheer at home, I will get it for you tomorrow!! I was like wow then but now going back, am thinking .. was I very expressive in telling how much I liked the kheer(which I knw is not the case as I dont remember saying nything more than just saying I liked it) or was it just the way I hogged or may be it was just the glow and hapiness in my face while eating it which was very evident!!Whatever the reason may be.. the word is spreading fast.. "jyotsna the foodieeee"
And now that the word has already spread, I wish he gets me Gulabjamuns also along with kheer :D geee

And More..

I thought it was all just with the airports.. but no.. the series continued through out the trip. At Goldie's place on saturday morning I woke up at 7 ( ppl say its becoz of Jet lag) and none of them were up. I looked here and there to see what I cud do silently without disturbing them. I couldnt find a toothpaste, cudnt find the correct TV remote , Couldnt find any magazines! so the next best option that looked very tempting was the swing in their backyard! I slowly tiptoed towards the backyard door and without making any sounds figured out how to open the door and was happy that I could open it! and then.. Hold your breath!! The loud alarm went up!! Guyiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!! Goldie woke up, her son woke up with his own alarm and yeah I just stood there like an idiot completely shocked!! I just managed to do something I just didnt want to do!!
Bl$%^%dy House alarm systems!!

And it continued..

Now after one story of boarding pass thing, the next one was just waiting to happen.
I had kept my laptop bag under the front seat during the take off and as soon as they gave the go ahead signal for using electronic appliances, i bent down trying to pull out the bag from the seat that was in front of me. I was not able to reach it, I tried hard but I just couldnt. and suddenly panic struck me, did I hurt my back or have I grown so fat suddenly that I am not even able to pull out my bag which is lying just down there. And then, Tada! I realised I had my seat belt fastened which was preventing me to go down!! relief then but then..All these days i thought it was bad only to become a poppat b4 others, but now I know, self Poppat is all the more worse!!!
Moral of the story: Never try to get a bag lying under the seat in front of you with your seat belt fastened!!!

Videshi Poppat series

Now its a new high of my poppat series! Its called the Videshi poppat! and it all really makes me feel like a proper gaon wali .. new to a city.
Last weekend , I was traveling from Omaha to Oakland. I went to the airlines counter and thought of trying my hand at the self help checkin Kiosk. It prompted me for my ticket confirmation number and then asked me to insert the passport for scan. I looked left n right to see where I need to insert my passport and then I found a creek(I am sorry but not getting the right word here .. that small gap in the machine) just enough to put in my passport. I put my passport and hit Enter but nothing happened. I pushed my passport even further and tried again, still nothing happened and it was still asking for passport. And then, I saw on my right there was another creek which clearly had a lable Passport scanning here. And everything was suddenly all crystal clear! where I had pushed my passport full inside was the one from where the boarding pass comes out printed!!!!
And I started trying frantically to remove my passport from that kiosk but in vain. Then to add up to my embarrassment, the airlines guy came up and asked what happened and why my passport was out there.. I sheepishly told him what happened and he again showed me the label which said PASSPORT ScANNING HERE and I said yeah I saw that after I put my passport here. He laughed and got the keys for that kiosk, opened it and gave me my passport. I really wished I just ran away from there but I had to stand there and face that guy coz I didnt have my boarding passes yet!!!! Thats what we call Sone pe suhaga in desh!!
I had never been more proud of myself :(