Bouts of guilt.

Do you believe in the eveil eye/nazar lagna/dishti concept? Even I never took it very seriously till I happened to experience it first hand.
Coming to some elaboration on the concept, people say that if X is not hapy abt Y's happiness and is very Jealous of Y, then something bad will definitely happen to Y if X has that Bad.. Evil eye. There will be some people who will be unaffected by others success, happiness and prosperity but some get really cranky.
And to not to have such effects of buri nazar, they do Nazar utaarna/dishti theeyatam.
First time when someone utarofied my dishti was after my marriage, Naresh's mom did that for both of us and I found the process extremely funny, but now I see some sense in it because it really does work.
Ok.. now coming to what happened in my case..
I am currently in a project which is still in mobilizing state.. as in team formation. and they are filling up both offshore and onsite positions. I had been staffed for a module lead-offshore position. Later I was asked to interview other resources for the team.
There was one girl, a Java resource whom I had to interview for an offshore position but required to travel to onsite for knowledge transition KT. < My manager told me that I need not travel onsite for KT as I had to handle offshore KT> I started sulking the moment I heard it as there was nothing else that I could do about it!
I went to interview this girl and may be because of my sulky state of mind or whatever, I didnt make her feel comfortable and asked her all possible crap. But I have to admit she was good! she was damn good. So at the end, as instructed by my manager I asked her if she was ok to travel and had no problems with it and whether she had a passport or not. I could see the glow in her face as she almost jumped and said, she had no problems travelling and whatsoever!!
By this time my mood had worsened.. it was the only thing in my mind.. I was actualy cursing my luck that how could i have been in a situation where I am interviewing a person for such good opportunity and I myself am not able to take it up even if I so badly want to! I truly felt I was more deserving :)
I was also very very jealous of this girl but conveyed my manager that she was good and we can take her.
I kept sulking that evening and shared my woes with almost everyone possible just to pacify my badly beaten ego and luck.
Believe it or not, two days later my Manager came to me and said we were not able to staff that girl. Because by the time my manager went with the staffing request, she was staffed by some other project. and he said we might have to look for other people to fill up that post in our project.
Then my guilt took over me, it rarely happens this way. Two projects trying to staff the same person at the same time when there are hundred others lying free on bench. Her tough luck that she got staffed in to a project which didnt require her to travel or may be it was my jealousy which turned as bad luck for her.
From that day on, my guilt pangs keep coming back whenever I see her anywhere in office.
I really feel bad about my own thinking and the way I took things.. its a small opportnity which really doesnt matter much for me at this stage of life and there will be lot of such offers or even better ones that will come my way in future.. I shouldve been happy for her that she was getting that opportunity.. instead I sulked and believe me till date that position in our project has not yet been staffed .. for some reason or the other.. :(

From then on I decided to make a conscious effort in being truly happy for others when they are getting something that I am not.. and I highly recommend this to all of you because it really makes you grow as a person..a lot better person :)