Couple of thoughts

1) If I am through learning, then am through.

Reason : Am learning a lot , through people, through books, through articles, through everything else around me. Its fascinating to know about new things, but the day that enthusiasm will die within me to learn new stuff, I will be done with everything else .

2) Everybody is a genius, but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree it will spend its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Einstein

The fish is best at swimming, it knew it couldn't climb  a tree. It still went ahead and tried and got judged on that. Fish got it right almost there.

Fish failed and it let the judgement make her believe it was a stupid! It really was stupid. How can we make someone else's judgment affect us so bad that we stop believing in ourselves and our abilities? Why does it matter so much.. what others think of me should ideally be none of my business.. but in this bad bad world.. it just doesn't work that way. People judge you every minute, everyday on everything. For you to be declared the best in the field, someone else who is already considered the best needs to judge you and tell you .. you are the best! When you try to tell the world, you really are good at something, you will be considered pompous!

Tomorrow I will be judged on my knowledge I gained over last couple of months, with just 45 questions. It sure is going to affect me if I do not get through, but I don't want to end up being the fish which thinks its stupid all its life simply based on tomorrow's judgement. Is this doable? Am I ready for it? Am in a total smudged state of mind and hence this post to get some clarity and do some introspection. God bless me, I do not want to fail.

Back to learning.

little ones- Sweet littles

The little ones innocence instills some hope in you that its not that bad a world afterall.
Some things that they say, amuses you , and makes them even more adorable.

Yesterday, I took out my lunch box after coming from office and my daughter asked me, "Mamma, did u finish your lunch? What did u take? " I told her I took rice and I finished it. What she said next, made me feel so good! She said "Very good Mamma.. good job :) " I dont remember when was the last time I was appreciated for emptying my lunch box :) She just made my day by saying that!

The other day, it was her usual pee pee session before sleep, and she was not getting it. I was sleepy and was asking her to do it fast. She said " Mamma, am not getting it now, I will do it tomorrow ok? " Awww..

I hope she retains her innocence longer and give us more such precious moments!

Celebrating "we"

Up together,Down together
Laugh together,Cry together
fun together, fight together
Life together, Love together!

My best buddy, my rock solid support system, sense injector(phrase patented :D), fight master,  love of my life.. Happy "Reception" Anniversary sweet heart! :) :)

mere desh ki dharti..

One of my friend has recently come back from US after staying there for a good two and a half years. After coming back, she started cribbing about everything, pollution to start with , traffic, power cuts, vegetables, fruits, facilities and life in general. I was a little pissed off initially to hear her crib cause it's just 2 years that she had been in US and has been in Bangalore all her life. Nothing new that she has been cribbing about, all the problem have been existant from long long time.


Now that I've put it in writing, it hurts more. Why haven't these issues been addressed in these 2 or more years? Why is the quality of life only degrading by the day?

The everyday struggles include power cuts, limited water supplies, increasing prices and traffic and also the pollution.

You curse yourself for settling in India when you are in the middle of your bath and you are left with half a bucket of simmering hot water and with no cold water supply
( The vice versa would've been still better to deal with). You have water but still can't use it. As useless as it gets.
These everyday struggles compell me to think if I have done the right thing by settling back in India, may be I would've had a better life if I settled abroad like most of my friends. But then these thoughts vanish the time I see my daughter play with her grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, visits places attached to my childhood memories, has a similar childhood as her parents and also when I meet my parents when I feel like(which is more than twice a year) and when they need me and talk to my mom in the same time zone. Being there for your parents when they need you, celebrating festivals together, spending liesure time with them is definitely something that can be achieved if you are here.


I am happy for the guys who have settled abroad, living a better quality life(if not a better life), away from the chaos, away from the loved ones and the lovely food(a general observation that its only the food that Indians settled in US miss the most and have a long list of cravings whenever they visit home )

Am back and with a bang! Life is totally happening at the moment and am all kicked about it! Now that you believed that part, let me tell you more :)
Its the 21st century and good and honest people still prevail! I was lucky to meet one (other than the one I see everyday at home :) ) at office.

I dropped 200 bucks in the office parking lot in the morning and didn't even realize it untill  I saw a postit stuck on my bike saying "if you have lost money, contact me at #####". I almost ignored it thinking how can I lose any money and then checked my jerkin pocket to find the 200 bucks for petrol missing.
I called this guy the next day and after some queries, he asked me to come and collect the amount. I was so super excited to meet this person, that I didnt even ask his name! I just took my money, thanked him profusely and came back jumping !

200 feels like a big amount when you lose it or find it, I would've never attempted to return the money if I found it in the parking, I would've simply justified my act by thinking how do I know whose money is it and whom and how do I return it to! Now that I have met this super cool guy, am inspired! Its really a pleasure to meet such good people and I've decided to be one :)

Ps: I have kept the postit and the 200 bucks safe to keep reminding me of this resolution.

Reality Bites-- Ouch!

Kids can be too honest sometimes.. too honest for our comfort.
Was having a simple game of identifying colours with Akshara. She identified all colours on her dress and then on mine, then she pointed to my nose and I asked her which colour, she thought for a while and to save some grace I offered "Brown? " , she bluntly said "NO, Black!" ! :-|

I offered her other choices dark brown, wheatish cream, but she would not budge! I finally had to relent to her choice of Black!

The sheep sings off with her 3 bags of wool! :)

Break time

Sometimes your body just gives up on you..no matter what the mind says. It had been one hell of a hectic week/month and it continues to be so. First the exam then lots of in house guests, then the maid leaving amidst chaos, Akshara's birthday+her falling sick and my work has left me completely exhausted.

I want to get transported to Maldives(Duh! In my dreams!) :) Okay, I am ready to settle down for any calm, serene, seashore place with pleasant weather and no one to disturb. I need a break! I need some sleep, and am dying to laze around with yum dishes being served time to time. Ironically, I also want to badly hit the gym, with vengeance, its been a month since my last visit!


Best part is there still is a feel good to all that happened, I could successfully survive through all the madness and get things done of course with lots of help and support from N. He must be equally exhausted. Come on N, lets go go go!! :)

Silence

The smile on your face let's me know that you need me


There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me

The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall

You say it best when you say nothing at all

-Ronan Keating
  A song that touches your soul everytime you hear it, with such superlative lyrics, and the music to die for.   Silence can do things for you which a 1000 words cant, its golden and its also shattering. It hurts more when you dont say a thing.   After 2 weeks of working from home, today when leaving for work, my daughter didn't even say a bye, her silent look which said a lot of things to me, will leave me guilty for the rest of the day till I pick her up again. I wouldn't have felt as bad if she had just cried or got angry, cause it was expected. She did none of that. She didn't say a thing.

My Princess turns 3!

3 years? Already? With so much happening around in the daily humdrum, the time just seems to fly, which I know obviously is not the case. Time going at its own pace, and we are the ones hurrying up . Here's taking a minute to relive the wonderful journey so far.

From her birth till she turned one, I was so looking forward for her to grow up fast, to start talking, walking, running and lots of other stuff.

Second year was total joy ride filled with all her antics and a new event every other day. She started expressing, going to school, learning new things , making new friends.

The third year just flew by, me trying to cling on to any babyness that's still left in her. She is fast becoming independent, being able to clearly communicate what she wants( and not) making it so much more easier(or tougher?) for me. I no longer have to guess what my lil baby is going through and trying to communicate through her wails. I actually miss that, the feeling of triumph when we actually nail the problem and make the lil one happy. Now the only challenge thats left is to try to convince her to do what I want or do things my way( occassional occassion that is!)
Her charming innocence, so precious that I want her to be this way all her life. The here to stay cry-to-get-things-done manipulation is still bearable. My lil baby growing to a lil girl has lots of new interests, activities and tastes. She can spend minutes(if not hours) before the mirror admiring herself, making faces. She wouldn't step out of the house unless she is satisfied with the way she looks, her dress, matching bindi and bangles and clips.. the list goes on. She is a big show off :) (Her teacher commented in last PTM that she shows off her dress every other day )
She loves to dance, enjoys music, watches movies(of her choice , of course!) , loves to travel and is a big foodie! She loves to try different dishes which appeal to her eye and she is only making me a better cook by each day. Fish and eggs being her favorites, she has also just started to develop a sweet tooth(She can lick the chocolate sauce clean).

These days she has acquired a new quality, feeling shy in a very feminine way. The moment she is shy, she closes her face with her tiny hands and looks askance which is like a typical 'Adaa' and very unlike me(Sigh!)!

The best part for me is she is absolutely adaptive and accommodative. I put her in to any situation and she adapts like magic. She lets me be, lets me work, pursue hobbies, study, go gymming, cooking and travelling. She blends in to my routine without causing any glitches and also seems to enjoy herself.

God Bless you my sweetheart, with all the happiness in the world and best of health. I will try my best to fulfill God's blessings :) and I will make sure you enjoy your day tomorrow and the whole year ahead. Love you sweety.

Awesome threesome!

Super excited today. My sister and her family visiting us today. Just can't wait to see our 2 little ones, Arush and Ishaan and so looking forward to the chaos the threesome(A,I,A) are going to create. I don't care if they break a thing or two.

Arush has always been special for me, he was the first baby I held and felt the joy. First baby whose poop and peep didn't seem all that bad afterall :) . Our entire family went crazy with his arrival. Whatever he did was special! Inspite of all of us being sleep deprived zombies, we revelled in all his baby activities.

After Akshara's arrival, the bonding got even stronger. Their cousin chemistry is plain awesome. They fight, jump, dance, play together and thats a sight to see!

Ishaan, the latest naughty arrival in to the family , is a joy. Everything he does, looks cute. The way he walks, they way he climbs, the way he breaks things!

Looking forward to the picnic (read Chaos) the 3 kids are going to create in the next 1 week!

Race 4 continues

Am on a high! Basking in my little moment of glory I had only dreamt of. I cleared the certification exam with a modest score of 83%, one more question and a 90 would've sounded so much more better! But nonetheless, I am happy!

With one hurdle crossed, there are so many more to be handled. Akshara's caretaker cum domestic help has given us a big shock. Some reality checks and she failed us big time. Time to look for alternatives , alternatives that neither I am sure of, nor is Akshara.

With Akshara's bday coming up and lots of people in the family visiting us, its going to be one hectic time managing work schedule and the guests and also planning for the party. The house is in a mess and needs big time cleanup.

Mission Cleaning up begins 3:00 PM today sharp.

Race - 4

Starring - Akshara, N and Me
(Un)Supporting cast - Ratna, Boss, Cabbie, etc etc

Last year, I was wishing that life had become too routine and if only it was a little more eventful. Someone up there heard me hard and decided to give what I wished for and more! Am sure he is having fun now watching me huff n puff, trying to catch up with everything that's happening around.

Since January, I have been living life per day basis, each day throwing up a new challenge. I take on the challenge and head in one direction and before I make any progress, the basic premise for my direction changes and I find myself totally back to square one.

I am badly waiting for my exam to get over tomorrow, I've had enough! Seriously. Too many hurdles for just preparing and giving the exam.

I will complete this story tomorrow with full details. Tension surmounting.

August 26, 5:30 PM IST.

Ramzan special - Chicken keema Kabab

Its awesome to have muslim friends. They are friendly , generous and super talented. Thanks to my daughter, her bestie Manha's mom is my friend too. This being the Ramzan month, Akki and me qualified as poor and needy who should be given the iftaari(I think thats the word, not sure) , the food they eat to break the day long fast. Its a feast. Entire table spread of specialities, day after day.
All this left my N sulking that he is not getting to eat any of those. So in order to satisfy his foodie soul, I picked up a recipe from Shabanaji and did it for him. Big hit in the house and hence this share. Try it and you will not regret.
All you need:
1) Chicken mince 250 grms
2) 3 bread slices- sids cut
3) 1 large /2 medium onions finely chopped
4) Ginger garlic paste - 1 tbsp
5) 4 greenchilly - finely chopped
6) Curry leaves and corriander leaves - finely chopped
7) Vinegar - 2 tbsp
8) Salt, chilly powder, dhaniya jeera powder, garam masala - as per your taste.
9) 1 egg beaten
10) bread crumbs
11) Oil - 4 tbsp

Method:
Add vinegar to the mince and mix properly. Leave it aside for 10 minutes.
Now add all the rest of the ingredients to the mince. Crumble the bread to small pieces and add to the mince.
Leave this mixture to marinate for an hour. Bread will help bind everything.

Now heat a pan, add 2 tbsp oil for shallow fry.
Take small portions of the marinated mince, flatten then on your palm, shape them, roll them in the beaten egg, then coat them in the bread cumbs and shallow fry them on low flame on the pan.

Keep the patties thin to ensure complete cooking on mince, since this is shallow fry and not deep. it takes about 10 to 15 minutes for these kababs to cook on the low flame.
Serve them hot with green chutney. Heavenly!

Thank you Shabanaji!

Miss you RJ!

I have been lying low on motivation at work for the last couple of weeks. The enthu has died down. On introspection, I found the reason for this sudden low is my teammate RJ. She had been my arch Rival. Yes, you read that right! Right from the day 1 in the project, I hated her, every day, every minute. She is bitchy, over smart, clever and everything else that I am not :) (I take the privilege to say that since this is my blog! If you beg to differ, say it somewhere else :) )
We were both in the same shift, the competition rife, constant struggle to outdo her kept me on my toes and I enjoyed it. It was more like a mind game, trying to predict what she would do next and what she actually meant when she said what she said. We constantly did stuff to outsmart each other and somewhere in between, there might have been a remote possibility of budding friendship which we didn't choose to explore.
She left our team 2 weeks ago due to personal constraints, and here I am missing her terribly. My biggest motivation is gone!

Thanks RJ for bringing out the best in me, You are being missed. I will look forward to working with you again, whenever that is!

Thoda hai, thode ki zaroorat hai

Yet another independence day celebration in India, all it means is more vendors at traffic signals selling Indian flags, bands and other accessories. Its pathetic to see kids being made to sell that stuff. Ironically enough, the dream India our freedom fighters envisioned!


The struggle and meaning of Independence is now a mere chapter in history books for kids today. All they know about our Independence day is that its a holiday and a celebration at school where they perform.

If only the schools took some extra effort to organise better activities for Independence day to create awareness amongst the children about their responsibility to build a better India for a better future. Just making children practise and dance/sing/march past is not helping anyone.

Why not spend the money they collect for the costumes or for organising the show on providing clothes to the underprivileged children on that day? Why not let senior students teach the junior underprivileged children that one day? Why not distribute fruits to govt hospital under privileged patients than distribute sweets amongst the school children?

Unless this awareness is created, there is no way a child is going to realise the value of whats being provided to him/her and what so many other children of their age are deprived of.



There are so many people around me who have money and who have an intention to give back to the society but do not know how! Giving back to society or serving the underprivileged needs more thought and effort than money. Some ideas which are pretty much doable and will value add:

1) If you are living in an apartment, start a collection drive, one per month. One month you could collect just a fistful of grains(rice, lentils, pulses anything) from each flat in your complex and donate this collection to a charity organisation/NGO in your locality.

2)You could start a stationary drive, notebooks, pencils, slates , collect just 10 ruppees from each flat and buy stationary and provide to under privileged children.

3)If you know of any old age homes/orphanages in your locality which are in dire state, you alone donating a lumsum one month is not going to solve their problem. Create more publicity for the orphanage, create a facebook page for them, register them via paypal and enable online donations. Ask your friends abroad to donate just 1$ every month.

4) Sometimes more than money or anything materialistic, all the orphan children need is your time. Spend one day of your weekend at one of those orphanages, trust me it will do a whole lot of good to them and to you too.


We have celebrated our independencr enough and its time to move ahead towards becoming a developed country. Instead of blaming the govt about how corrupt it is and how useless, lets do our bit ..

Rocking week of August '12

This week has been a mixed bag, travel, work, celebration, happy, stressful and everything else!

It started off with a long drive to Hyd, with our usual fave stop over at kurnool for some yummy super hot dinner. That restau is something else I say! Right by the side of highway, no great ambience, but the food he serves, addictive! Drive was awesome, with some drizzles and music and lil disturbance from the daughty.

Another 4 hr drive to Basar and the purpose of the trip was met. Akshara thoroughly enjoyed writing on slate. Mom got her a pattu langa and she looked super cute in it.

Its a different high to meet your parents and spend some quality time. Monday being my weekly off from work, I got a chance to go with mom n dad to Yadagirigutta and Surendrapuri. It was good to be the center of their attention for those couple of hours( privilege I got as hub and akshara were at home, else I feature last in the list). Surprisingly dad let me pay the bill for lunch, I was happy. I left around 40 bucks as tip and dad was a lil furious, usual round of class for me, that I dont value money, why I left so much as tip :-D 20 bucks wouldve been enough and all that. Dad, you are real cute! Keep doing that! How much I miss those everyday class peekuds :)

Then it was N's Bday. This year, I struggled to decide what I should gift him. Its usually tough to get gift ideas for guys, and with so many occassions every year , its all the more tough to keep the surprise element going. What money cant buy, time and effort can. I decided to make it special for him this year and surprise him by gathering all his old friends who are still in hyd and bring in his bday. It took some effort to get their numbers and coordinate, but it was worth it. We went for a midnight biryani buffet and the party rocked with the gang of friends.

Work wise, it has been a lil turbulent with new changes being introduced to schedule , I am really not sure how I will cope up. Fingers crossed as of now. Cheese keeps moving, change is the only constant.. all these are good to read and state to someone else but not so good to experience it first hand! Cheese Buggers!

For the rest of the week, am looking forward to meeting some of my friends who are in Hyd and shopping of course!!!

Study Hours!

Inspiration: One of my ex-colleague quit her job and joined a college to pursue further studies. All this after having 2 babies. Last I heard she is doing great academically. Happy for her.

Desperation: I have a certification voucher that expires 30th of August. If I clear that, its going to give a huge edge over my bunch of super talented team members and cut throat competition.

Frustration: Inspite of the fast approaching exam date, surmounting course material to be reviewed, am not doing a thing to get past this exam successfully. The occassional day when guilt becomes overbearing, I open the cours material and breeze through a couple of pages, with absolutely nothing registering in my mind. The next time I open the same page, the content doesn't even seem remotely familiar. Am stuck on the same page, same para, same line for the last 2 days.

Botheration: Am blaming it on my age cells that am not able to concentrate and move rapidly through the course material. Fact is am not even trying. Am sitting like the lazy queen bee doing nothing and hoping for things to fall in place automatically.

Realization: Am wasting too much time(with hardly any left), being ridiculously shameless in accepting all this and writing it here and hence wasting more time, and inspite of this realization, sitting and smiling at the computer , checking my gmail and fb updates and the work mail.

Serious now! Sign off!

Nobody toucheth` my Cheese!

Couple of days ago, I read an article where the writer said, he was inspired after reading the book "Who moved my cheese?" and realised that he was leading a very very comfortable life. He went ahead and changed his job, office being the farthest from his home and a profile totally new. He changed a job in which he was flourishing and the office too was comfortably located from his residence. Strange people in this world. Strange here is my perspective though.

Same night I dreamt that I was loathing in a big block of cheese, licking it, enjoying it and fighting with anybody who dared touch my cheese! I am in a much comfortable space (cheese :) )today , and cannot fathom why I would move out of this which helps me balance and have peace of mind. Have I become less adventurous, Am I missing out on something, or is it something to do with age?

The copy of the book "Who moved my cheese?" is lying right there in the shelf, I tried reading through it a couple of times before but it scares me..

Men, Marriage and More

: Boy meets girl, they fall in love. Life looks beautiful, perfect and surprising how easily they met their Ms/Mr Right while he rest of the world is struggling. Boy pampers girl with shopping trips, flowers, chocolates and all. Girl wants to do something special for the boy and goes ahead and tries to cook something sweet n nice for her Mr Right. She cooks, but the end result of course was not as nice as she wanted it to be. She still takes it to the boy. The boy is overwhelmed, thanks her for the efforts she took for him, praises the not so nice dish as if its the best dish he ever tasted and she is the next best cook(after his mom of course!!) he has ever met!


They get married. Honeymoon period

: Newly wed Wife wants to impress her husband by cooking something nice and of his liking. After a lot of effort , she manages to pull out a dish . Husband after  eating(with a straight face), realises he is newly married and needs to praise his wife on her efforts.
Husband: Its nice honey, but may be there was a tad bit extra salt there, but thats ok , am sure you will do it better next time.
Wife encouraged by nice words: Oh sure, I will definitely make it better next time.


Post the honeymoon period, husband and wife settle down in to the regular world, start empathizing with the rest of the world and get in to the daily grind. Whoever said it was all rosy and love would get us through. We still need to eat to live and love.

: Wife cooks still with the same enthu to serve her husband and family something healthy and tasty to eat.(Author of the post being a girl, will give this benefit of doubt to all wives :) ) . Wife serves the food.
Husband(with a straight face) : Just eats. Doesn't say anything.
Wife: How is it?
Husband(With a puzzled straight face on why this question): Yeah, its good.
Wife: Why didnt you tell that before? You tell me its good only after I asked.
Husband: ???

: Wife cooks. Husband eats.
Husband: There is something missing in the dish. Why dont you call my mom or someone before cooking to ask how its done.
Wife(thinking) : I should never have asked him to tell how the dish was, the straight face was so much better to handle.
Sigh!
----------------------------------***End of story.. look for moral below***---------------------------

Dear Husbands,

A lot of effort goes behind planning, procuring, learning and cooking the dinner that you eat with straight faces. We as wives , do not expect you to thank us everyday for what we do. We do it out of our love for you, to make sure you get to eat something nice and healthy. A little acknowledgement , occassional appreciation from you would make us wives feel all the effort was worth it. Yes, criticism is also welcome, but not that frequently. Remember, its the same effort that goes in to making any dish, good or bad. Its just that sometimes the ratios go bad, it still doesnt mean we put in lesser effort or our intention of serving you tasty food was not there. When you do something, its human to expect a feedback. We are not saying you appreciate us everyday, but you surely will know when there has been an extra effort put in by seeing the dish that was made. Acknowledge/Appreciate before we ASK. trust me, you are only going to see better results by taking that small step. You could apply the same work funda you apply at work, Appreciate and get more work done!!
Yes, we know that men are from Mars and have issues being vocal about their feelings, so to help you out, your acknowledgement/appreciation can come in the below forms too:
1) Smile at us after eating the first bite. We will know.
2) Raise your eyebrows and nod your head, we will be glad.
3) Lick your fingers, we will be happy :)
4) Clean your plate and empty the dish(clear it with rice or roti), we will be delighted.
5) Be a little diplomatic when you criticize, camouflage it coz trust me, a bad remark after all those efforts that you didnt like it, leaves us sulking!
Thats all we want you to do! In your own lil way, tell us you are not taking our efforts for granted and do acknowledge!
Yours lovingly,
Wives


P.S: N, Are you reading this Honey?

This week..

I loved the week thats gone by! It started on Monday with shopping at commercial and ended on friday with shopping at Central! whoopieeeee! Nopes, I have not added much to my already overflowing wardrobes, but still the very act of shopping peps me up! Shopping on friday was completely impromptu and I totally loved it.

It had been equally hectic week at work too, escalations, incidents, problems, attitudes, discussions and documents. But it was good. I like it that way.

Made it to gym 4 days this week, which I thought was good enough! What I realised on friday was that, the gymming isnt helping much, the jeans just got tougher to fit in to. Jeans shrink everytime we wash them, don't they? :D

Couple of cooking disasters too.. but that's ok. who is complaining anyway? :)

Akshara madam has started behaving like every other toddler, trying the teary way of getting things done at the drop of the hat! The moment I say NO to any of her demand, the loud cry starts instantly with tears rolling down her cheeks in the waterfall model. What's surprising is that, the moment she gets what she wants, the tears also stop rolling midway on the cheeks. Some manipulation that! I have been giving in too much, and am sure that banging from N is not very far away!